Table manners

What are table manners? They are a code of behaviour linked to a place and a culture and which are, consequently, changed over time. The certainty is that, as with language, they will continue to vary and will undergo enormous changes even in the future.
Manners tied to the table, those we know and practice, are the modern derivation of an immense number of rules that have been codified starting from the late Middle Ages, in the cuisines of the French and Italian Courts, and they have been definitively spread to other international cuisines.
In learning a bit of the “theory,” it is well to remember that the correct setting for a formal meal is quite different from that of a pleasant and informal plate of pasta – perhaps while waiting for the game to start – and thus the aesthetic aspect of a well-laid table must never be detached from a certain practicality.
We will start with the table dimensions, which need to be big enough for the number of guests. Whether they are too far apart or too close can cause embarrassing situations and complicate serving.
Always choose the tablecloth best suited to the occasion, reserving the best, preferably monochrome, quality tablecloths for special occasions.
Centrepieces and candles are welcome, but they should not interfere with conversation (no too-tall candlesticks) or annoy with too strong perfumes that mask the aroma of the food. All creative decorations only serve to make the fact of gathering around the table more pleasant, but they should always be in good taste.

How to lay the table?

For formal occasions, a charger is a good idea, as it remains for the entire meal, and on top of which the dinner plate and soup plate can be set. In the case of several courses it would be better to have a trolley or a placement surface handy for rotation of plates. The cutlery: the knife to the right of the plate, with the cutting edge facing inwards, next to the spoon; the forks on the left, no more than three; above the plate, the dessert pieces, fork with handle to the left, knife or spoon with handle to the right. Other cutlery or special cutlery – for example two-pronged forks or pincers for snails – can be brought to the table a moment before serving the dishes for which they are indicated.
Glasses are always above the right-hand cutlery, and there should be no more than 4. The largest is for water, and it can also be larger and lower (as in a tumbler) with respect to the wine goblets. The goblets are set in scale, starting with the first to be filled, and other glasses can be brought to the table only when they are needed, taking away those no longer needed or those from which the guest is no longer drinking. To the left of the dinner plate, there might be the half-moon salad plate or the bread plate.
To sum up, set crockery, cutlery and dishes appropriate to the food served, condiments in their proper, perfectly clean containers.
For fish-based meals – and one time strictly necessary – a finger bowl is allowed. The napkin is to the left of the plate or on top of it. Notwithstanding origami-style folding (hats, swans, flowers) which are quite welcome, it is always best to opt for the simplicity of an immaculate and freshly ironed napkin. Lastly, one of the more delicate aspects of table etiquette requires a pinch of personal sensitivity: guest seating. The host and hostess should be seated at opposite ends of the table; to the host’s right is the first female “guest of honour” and to his left the second; the same rule applies for male guests on either side of the hostess. At table, the eldest always deserve the seats of honour.